Bian and I had a lovely—if at times odd—trip to Cancun over the Thanksgiving holidays. We probably wouldn’t stay in a resort again but that is another post for another day. One evening as we were sitting in the snack bar (the food was ATROCIOUS at this resort), I was enjoying one of my many margaritas and Bian her Roy Rogers, when a chubby, ruddy, middle aged man missing an eye asked if he could take the seat across from me at the table. (Bian was behind me, swinging on one of the neat wooden swings right near where the parrots were perched). What could I say? I invited himto sit all the while glancing around to see how far away the bar was.
He proceeded to move his chair very close to mine (red flag? pinkish?), and in three minutes flat (maybe 4 if I need to be generous) proceeded to tell me these things:
- He was from a town just outside Antwerp.
- He lived with his parents. (Red flag!)
- He worked with helicopters and that’s how helost his eye and why he was in a coma for 6 weeks. (Maroon flag).
- He then proceeded to tell me, not 10 feet away from my 9-year-old-dauter the filthiest joke I believe Ihave ever hear. Let’s just say it involved a mailman, the “slots” he puts his mail into each day, and how he isn’t finished until his “sac” is empty. (There is no flag to represent such a country)
I then said to Bian, “Hey, think it’s time we go find your father?” Bian: “Good idea!” We moved over to the sports bar. 10 minutes later we saw him chatting up some dude there, not 15 feet from us. Needless to say, we fled. We had to avoid him the rest of the time. A coincierge at the hotel told us that he and his parents come twice a year and he is harmless but known for his lack of um…social skills.
So glad I attract the best of people all over the world NOIT just in my own country!!!