Goodbye sweet Gaston.. I hope Ry, Bella and Lalo (along with Kelly, Zach, Juno, Sugarfoot and the rest) were on the bridge to meet you. We’ll see you soon.
First lines of her new book Lots of Candles and Plenty of Cake:
” It’s odd when I think of the arc of my life – from child to young woman to aging adult. First I was who I was. Then I didn’t know who I was. Then I invented someone and became her. Then I began to like what I’d invented. And finally I was what I was again.”
I think I am starting to get that. I remember who I was as a kid–I remember beign my most powerfulas a kid at age 11-12, before puberty came on. And then I didn’t know who I was. And yes, like Anna, I created someone I thought I wanted to be–should be, tried to be. And now that I’m inching toward 50, I think I’m back to feeling powerful about the real me, about who I am. I’m certainly not 11 or 12 again, but I am feeling powerful about what I want to say and how I want to say it.
This week’s “events” have certainly crystallized that. And while they’ve casued several sleepless nights, filled with dark thoughts and anxeity-driven roanings about the house, I can’t help but feel there is someting more in motin here and if I follow it, it’ll follow me.
I wonder if a fellow columnist like Anna Quindlen would dain to talk to me about this. Maybe I should just read her book.
THis is entirely surprising to me.
I started up yoga again. I used to do it pretty regularly a few years ago but lapsed. So I took a few level I classes the past two weeks and found them…lacking in something. Too easy? Not challenging? Boring. All of the above. And at one of them — all women–there was a lot of chatter going on amongst them and even the female teacher. I felt like shouting,. “This is yoga people! Not your book club!” But of course I was in Bālāsana or Child’;s Pose and shouting didn’t seem appropriate.
So then TODAY I took a Level II class with a guy named Kila who was about…50, Hawaiian with one hell of a body and unreal flexibility and in an hour we did headstands, shoulder stands, and backbends. It seemed more like a Level III class to me and he didn’t even offer people alternative poses. I’m a little disappointed with that. From my previous practice (and the fact that my best friend is a certified Iyengar instructor), I know that you are supposed to offer “modifications” that you cn do. A couple of the ladies in there seemed genuinely…injured. Wiped out. Pissed off. And out of their league. Seriously. I kind of want to talk to him about that but it was my very first time with him so…do I have the right to ask him? I knew how to do most of the poses but that was most definitely NOT a level II class. I’ll bet there won’t be as many gals there next week. Not even sure I’LL be there next week.
I have another Level II class on Friday with a different guy. We’ll see. (Yeah,. we’ll see if I can get out of bed tomorrow…)
By the way, B.K.S. Iyengar is turning 94 this year. Here he is at 86. Holy smokes!
Absolut Annik
